Kenz
Well, I’m fucked.
If only I meant it in a more literal way. Instead of me getting to finally ditch my virgin status, however, I was just in trouble.
Again.
Hayden, Tor, Char and Vance hadn’t said anything else to me on the ride home, but had they really needed to? Hayden had uttered my most tightly guarded secret, calling me by my real name, Mackenzie Williams.
The silence in the car crushed me. I struggled to breathe deeply, as if the air had thickened until it became too heavy to draw in. Despite that, even when the car pulled to a stop in front of the house, I didn’t move.
I didn’t reach for the door, didn’t make any attempt to exit. Even when the others got out, I sat there, frozen, staring down at my own lap because I couldn’t bring myself to look anywhere else.
Was this it? They knew who I was, knew how they could use that. If only I’d moved faster, avoided Jarrod, left that damn bugged reader behind, I wouldn’t be here. Now I’d potentially put Nem and the others in danger because I hadn’t been smart enough.
Here I am again, screwing up everyone else’s life.
The door opened, and I expected to find Hayden there. He was usually the one who escorted me, who watched out for me.
Instead, a dark hand appeared in front of me, waiting. I glanced up to find Tor staring down at me, his expression unreadable.
I’d caused enough trouble, so I set my hand in his and got out of the car. The slamming of the door felt like a warning shot.
We went inside, and I knew damn well I wouldn’t be allowed to go to bed. No matter how tired I felt, how much I wanted to lie down and sleep, it wasn’t possible.
Interrogations are better done when the subject is tired. I recalled Dane telling me that once, when he’d been trying to find out where I’d hidden some candy I’d stolen from the kitchen.
The memory made me smile, even as my eyes stung.
Tor released my hand and gestured at the couch. I’d done enough to piss them off, so I did as he asked, sitting like a good girl.
Why do I keep failing at that? Even when I want to do well, I still don’t measure up.
It seemed my path in life.
A mug was set on the table before me, the wonderful scent of coffee streaming from the top. Char pushed it toward me on the table with a single finger.
“Thanks,” I whispered and picked it up. The warmth seeped through the ceramic and into my palms, easing that tightness in my chest.
The others filtered in from the kitchen, one at a time, each with a cup of their own. It seemed we all needed the caffeine. Then again, I had no idea when they’d realized I was gone, so I didn’t know if they’d slept at all.
When they sat, however, the juxtaposition struck me. How many times had we done this?
“What are you smiling about?” Char asked, an edge to his voice.
“I was just thinking about how we’ve sat here just like this so many times. It’s weird to think it’s only been a few weeks.”
“And we almost never did it again,” Vance muttered, a simmering anger in his tone.
“Getting right to it.” I took a sip of the coffee, the taste of the sugar substitute familiar and welcome. “So you know who I really am?”
Hayden nodded, his face an already familiar one. He had the expression he wore when he was trying to stay calm, to be the adult in the room. “Yeah, we know.”
“How much do you know?”
“Enough,” Char snapped. “Even this far away, the Williams family is well known. Of course, as far as anyone knew, Mackenzie Williams, the last legitimate heir, was killed about a year ago.”
Tor’s gaze dropped to my stomach as he narrowed his eyes until the gold just barely peeked out.
“Yeah,” I nodded and touched the scar through my shirt. “I wasn’t lying about that. This is where my father shot me.”
“Why fake your death?” Hayden asked.
“Because it was the only way for me to have a life. Otherwise, people would try to use me. I wouldn’t be able to go to school, to have a real life, because people would constantly be trying to make use of my name and my bloodline. My father was Kyler Williams and my mother Caroline Hester.”
Hayden cursed beneath his breath, the word vulgar enough to take me by surprise, given he didn’t typically say such words. “So you’re essentially a mafia princess, huh?”
“So you see why I lied? If anyone knew who I was, I’d never be free, I’d never get to live my life how I wanted. My father used me all my life, caring only about how he could sell me off to benefit himself. I didn’t want that future.”
“There are rumors that the girl who took over Kyler’s spot was related to him, but it’s not easy to get anything specific.”
I couldn’t stop myself from seeing Nem’s face then, from seeing the way she scowled, or better the way her expression softened whenever she looked at me. “Nem. She’s my sister—well, half-sister. We share a mother, but her father wasn’t Kyler.”
“Fucking hell,” Char whispered. “You’re telling me that your sister is Nemesis? The psycho bitch who runs the west coast?” He paused, then let out another string of curses. “Which means those bodyguards you talked about, you’re saying they’re the Quad?”
I laughed softly at his tone. It was far from the first time people had reacted in such a way when they figured out I knew the Quad. Normally, it amused me. A flash of fear when the recognition hit.
This time, my laughter felt hollow.
“Yeah,” I admitted. “They’re like brothers to me.”
“And who were you talking to in that alley? I didn’t recognize the voice and it doesn’t seem from the conversation that he was one of the Quad,” Hayden asked, his tone barely contained anger.
In for a penny. I had no reason not to tell them, did I?
“He’s a fixer. He goes by the Fox.”
“Jesus,” Vance growled out. “Even I know about him.”
“I guess this explains why getting attacked didn’t freak you out,” Hayden said. “Why would it when you were raised as a mafia princess surrounded by the worst of the worst, when your family has the most dangerous killers in it?”
“It’s not like that,” I said.
“Not like what?” Char asked. “Because I’ve worked in the shadows long enough to hear plenty of stories. Are you going to tell me they’re killers with a heart of gold or something?”
I shook my head. “It’s not that. I know how dangerous they are, but that’s not who they are to me. To me, they’re family. To me, Nem is the woman who could have left me to my fate, to get sold off by my father and killed, but she didn’t. She risked everything and came back to rescue me. The Quad are my brothers, men who put themselves between me and danger time and time again. They’re overbearing and annoying, but they care about and look out for me and gave me stability in life when I didn’t have any. Even the Fox—he stepped in like a father for me when he had no reason to. I’m not stupid. I know people fear them, but to me? They’re just my family.”
Hayden let out a sigh that implied he thought me stupid. “You’re naïve, Kenz.”
“I’m really not. I didn’t grow up nearly as sheltered as you seem to think. I’ve seen my share of terrible things, I’ve seen people killed, I’ve been targeted, I even know what it’s like to feel my blood leaking away and think…this is it. It was the Fox who carried me to help, who saved me, and it was Nem who took over for my father to ensure I could leave and get away from that life. I know exactly who and what they all are.”
Silence descended on the room, but it held less tension than before. It seemed like they each thought hard, like they worked through the pieces I gave them.
“Does Lorien know who you really are?” Char asked.
I nodded. “He does. He said it on the phone when we spoke alone.”
“So that’s why he wants you?”
I shuddered as I remembered the way he’d called us soulmates. “He said he loves me. When you were out of the room, he said that my real identity was why his family supported him going after me, but that he wanted me because we’re soulmates.”
A strange chill crept over my skin, and when I looked toward Tor, a darkness in his gaze made me want to curl in on myself. He blinked quickly and ripped his gaze from mine, as though shielding me from it.
“Doesn’t that mean you’ve met him?” Vance asked. At my look, he shrugged. “If he claims he loves you, he must have met you. He came back specifically for this auction, for the one where you were set to be sold. He had to have met you somehow then, or he wouldn’t have had any reason to target you.”
“He used a voice changer on the phone,” Char pointed out. “Even if she knew him, she wouldn’t recognize his voice.”
Hayden set his coffee down, most of the drink gone. “His family here is almost as big as the Williams family on the West Coast. It’s possible he met you at an event sometime. Maybe he became obsessed then? While his family is important, it’s too far for him to have had a hope of getting you from your father, but once you weren’t protected? If he figured out your death had been faked, he might have just kept searching until he found you.”
“Maybe,” I said, unable to deny it. “My father knew a lot of people, after all, and I met more than I could hope to remember from parties.” I rubbed my eyes, the coffee not doing nearly enough to keep me awake.
Then again, I’d snuck out the night before, which meant I hadn’t managed any shut-eye. The idea of going to class today felt wholly impossible. How could I force myself to get up, put on a fake smile and see anyone?
“You should sleep,” Hayden said.
“No, I’m fine.”
“You aren’t fine. You’re going to pass out on the spot.” Hayden took my mostly untouched drink from my hands. “You can miss your classes today and rest. You won’t be any good in them anyway.”
“I’m supposed to meet up with my advisor,” I said.
“That’s at four this afternoon. If you sleep now, you’ll get a few hours before you have to go.”
“So I can still go?” Hope sprang inside me. I’d thought after this fiasco he’d end up locking me down. I figured they wouldn’t let me do anything after this whole mess.
“Yes,” Hayden said, but the harshness in his tone said he I was far from being off the hook. “And tonight, after you’re back, we will have a very thorough conversation on exactly what you did wrong, Kenz.”
And here I thought I’d gotten off lightly…